"God, look at that guy, what a poseur." "What guy?" "The dude with the ridiculous chops and the intensely greased Elvis hairdo." "Oh, with the enormous skull & crossbones earrings?" "Yeah, that's the one. What a dick. I hate people who purposefully create an over-stylized image to send out a specific message." "Doesn't everyone do that?" "No. I don't do that." "Of course you do!" "No I don ...

Sometimes your brain makes a snap judgement of a situation and spurs you into action without much time for analysis or forethought. All I saw was a woman, standing in the middle of the pavement on Bayswater Road, with her pants around her ankles. She was standing in a puddle that had clearly just emitted from her own self. My immediate thought was that she was pregnant, and that her water had bro ...

before after hard to believe it's the same person, I know! many thanks to Aaron for the sweet cut. ...

YOGA INSTRUCTOR: "Daniel, your spine is not flat against the wall, can you push it out a bit?" ME: "No, this is as far as it goes. I've always had a pretty sharply curved spine." YOGA INSTRUCTOR: "Wow, that's a really severe curve." ME: "Yeah, I think it's genetic, my dad and one of my brothers has the same thing." YOGA INSTRUCTOR: "That's okay, we can fix that." ME [joking]: "Cool, will that ...

Writing about my trip to Oslo is somewhat hampered by the fact that I was perpetually either drunk; or recovering from being drunk, or, most frequently, in various degrees of overlap between these two states, neither of which are particularly inducive to good memory. I remember that the wind was cold, I remember that the beer was expensive, I remember that it was beautiful, I remember that I had a ...

[ring ring] "Hi Katie, it's Dan." "Hi Dan, what's up?" "Uhm, I'm just filling in the ah, overtime spreadie, and it keeps coming back to me saying that I work half-an-hour overtime every day. Like, even when I work my minimum hours, it says I work half an hour overtime." "Well, what are your contracted hours?" "Nine to five-fifteen with a 45 minute break for lunch." "Hang on, I'll just... [s ...

Adrian, Craig & I (we're arranged alphabetically, AND by height). We're not quite as gay as we appear here. Okay, I can't really back that up. Wait: here's a picture of me and a bevy of beautiful women (all of whom slept with me shortly after this photo was taken*). That should do the trick. all photos courtesy of the sdc, there should be a full set up on there eventually * may contain untruths ...